Yes, Your Deconstruction Process Should Have an End Point
Ask yourself: what would Gustavo Gutiérrez do? (The answer probably wouldn't be to become an influencer.)
I have never liked deconstruction influencer culture. The stolen tweets, the constant reposts, the stagnant, repeated topics without real-world consideration, the marketing algorithm glories, the self-glorification, the corporate-sounding social media execution, the faux online world-building, the carefully constructed online personalities without a semblance of humanity, and, of course, the hawking of expensive classes and products to folks in dire straits by people with minimal real-world experience or educational background.
It feels fake, and it makes me want to throw up. I certainly try to make money from writing online, I want to reach people who find similarities to me and my story, and I want to promote my writings as a result, but I could never bring myself to fake… well, anything. Much to my professional downfall, I fear. If only I had given into the capitalist machine that so many of my “progressive” counterparts have done, if only I followed the same marketing plans and made connections with the same kinds of people, then maybe I’d be more successful.
At what cost? My privacy, my freedom, my soul? For me, deconstruction meant something. Not my own glory, but the idea of looking at the world through a completely different lens. I evolved and am still evolving, but I know what I believe and what I stand for. To me, that is the end goal of deconstruction.
Recently, I saw a person (someone who I respect and like and wouldn’t consider one of those self-promotion deconstruction influencer types, actually) say the following:
“It’s okay if there is no end goal to your deconstruction process.”
Now, listen. What I believe this person meant was that it’s okay if you don’t end up as a progressive Christian in the end. Maybe they feel as if you don’t have to have a final religious destination: you can stay comfortable within agnosticism and not have any answers for the more supernatural questions like whether or not there’s a God or what in the Bible is real.
To that end, I agree. Sure, I believe in God, in the divinity of Christ, and a few miracles therein. But I get why others still aren’t sure, one way or another, or that they start to find spiritual truth in another religious tradition. And I definitely get why people go from evangelical Christianity to the strictest, angriest atheism. It’s way more of a miracle that we go through that bullshit and stay religious, in my opinion.
But I’m talking about the deconstruction process end goal outside of abstract questions that can’t ever be answered. While many people come here for my takes on sex, polyamory, and religion, as ever, I always want to keep pointing you toward liberation theology, and yes, toward communism — at least as a concept, if not a practiced ideology to inform your political actions. In the wake of Gustavo Gutiérrez’s death on October 22, I believe it’s more important than ever.
Here’s the thing.
At the end of the day, I’m realizing my problem with deconstruction influencer culture isn’t just that they’re trying to make money. As someone with an OnlyFans account (most deconstruction influencers would never), I am part of that money-making capitalist/consumer culture — perhaps in an even more insidious way, depending on your views toward sex work from an anti-capitalist perspective — so what’s the harm in a little oh-so-polished, strategic posting? (Especially if it does help people — and trust me, it does.)
What actually bothers me, I think, is that many people believe they’re done with the conservative evangelical culture when the reality is that they’ve only discarded a few elements of it. In the same way that what bothers me about liberals (as a leftist) is that they’re so similar to conservatives, I am also frustrated with people who haven’t unlearned the individualism from evangelicalism, which may, incidentally, be the most grievous aspect of the whole thing.
Evangelicalism teaches you that your own personal salvation matters more than the collective good of Christendom, and causes great harm to people in the process. Deconstruction should teach you to unlearn that. But unfortunately, some people just start centering their journey more than the destination. And the results ultimately don’t inspire change and don’t help anyone.
I’ve begged people to not only deconstruct from evangelicalism, but from capitalism. So many people come to the deconstruction process because they’re sick of the hateful rhetoric toward the poor, immigrants, LGBTQ+ people, and anyone seen as a “sinner” or “different.” And that’s the starting place: realizing how our hatefulness has affected large groups of people.
But if you land at “Okay, let’s be nice to those people then!” you may be missing the point. How nice we are as individuals doesn’t change the material conditions for marginalized people. If you still support the empire and its goals, and if you still have comfort in the status quo of capitalism in a first-world nation that you wouldn’t be willing to sacrifice, then is it that dissimilar to your Aunt Joyce being nice to her gay friend while still believing they’re going to hell? So many of us still choose self-preservation, and we still want that individualistic glory: Jesus loves ME. Society loves ME. And I ALONE can fix things. I have the right opinions. I have the power and I can effect change. My voice is needed. I need the platform. I make the biggest difference.
And so it goes — and then suddenly, the top voices in the game are the allies, the people with the most polished social media, and the marginalized people themselves are shoved to the wayside.
Of course, so many of us are so hurt by church that the niceness DOES matter. The open advocacy is important, too. It’s helpful to see more and more allies and their perspectives, especially when we exvangelicals may still have lifelines back to our old communities as they watch us change our perspectives on long-held issues and, frankly, hold morally superior stances on how Christians should be treating other human beings. Trust me, I’m not saying deconstructionists are in any way the same as the conservative evangelicals who perpetrate the cruel world we live in.
But I grow weary.
So far, the only widespread collective action I’ve seen suggested by any major deconstruction influencer is “vote.” Now, I’m not an anti-voting type of communist (honestly, I don’t like any of the third parties either — and living in a purple state, I see the differences between red and blue governance) but I do recognize the complete failure of not only the electoral voting system but of the United States of America as a whole. I do not believe this country has any right to exist as is, and I believe in drastic measures as a result. I’m also a realist who understands that my opinion is among the lowest possible percentage of average Americans.
A few of them have openly spoken about Palestine, but most choose to avoid this topic altogether. Those opinions are considered too extreme, apparently, and many Christian influencers won’t speak about the ongoing genocide. I haven’t seen it brought up as a major topic at any progressive Christian festival or panel this year, and many openly support a presidential candidate who supports the organizations that keep the genocide ongoing as the possible solution. Why? They don’t want to alienate followers. They want to see both sides. They want to keep making money.
Voting Democrat is palatable. It’s more comfortable when they don’t have to see the openly fascist, much worse Republican candidate spouting off at the mouth, no matter how much the two candidates have in common.
Again, I’m not blaming anybody or saying they’re on the same level. I think there are real, serious, painful consequences to having Trump installed as a president that would actively harm marginalized people, and leftists who dismiss this fact are ruinous.
I just don’t understand the ideology of moving slightly to the left due to deconstruction without realizing how rotten the whole system is. I see many people who have made their entire deconstruction influencer platform revolve around one running bit: “insult conservatives.” To be fair, they certainly deserve it.
But that’s easy shit, man. Obviously, your blatantly racist grandfather is trash. You should stand against everything he promotes and believes. However, you need to move past that. What happens next in your deconstruction process? You can’t yell about stuff forever. It’s a stagnant position. Not only does it bring anyone to your side, but it doesn’t help people already on your side except to make them feel supported emotionally. The thing is, though: we need so much more than emotional support. We need liberation.
If the end point of your deconstruction isn’t collective empowerment, I’m not sure what you’re doing. You cannot help the masses while glorifying yourself, and if all your clever tweets and hundreds of thousands of followers aren’t finding ways to genuinely impact society, I’m not sure what it all means in the end.
What if there was a progressive Christian conference that centered collective liberation and empowerment instead of individual liberation and empowerment? Would it get funding from the pro-LGBTQ+ (if you’re married and monogamous) but otherwise conservative “liberal” Christian institutions? What if the result of deconstruction was more than “I vote Democrat instead of Republican now”? The vote may still matter, but in my opinion, it’s not supposed to be that easy. I’m tired of feeling like I have to ease people into the rejection of evangelical values they claim to have already discarded.
I’m still a Christian, and when I deconstructed, my world changed. I believe that Christ wishes to see his kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven and that it is the job — nay, the life’s work — of his followers to bring it as close as possible. Not just for Americans, but for everyone. For those suffering as a result of capitalism and colonial domination — for Palestine. It won’t be popular or well-liked, but it matters that you have an ethical stance that shapes your entire worldview, even if it’s no longer Christianity.
And if you find yourself in a position of influence, ask yourself not just what you’re fighting against, but what you’re fighting for. And furthermore, ask yourself how you can use that influence to accomplish those goals. Even if you lose followers. Whether you keep your faith or not, your beliefs toward the total liberation of the poor should be authentic. That is the point of deconstruction.
Your deconstruction process should not end with a brand. It should end with a rejection of the self-centered individualism that evangelicalism taught us was holy.